Author Archives: Danielle

Danielle

Danielle is a producer from 9-5 (no, not the movie kind; more like a project manager). She grew up in Kansas with Mary, and now lives in Los Angeles. When she's not writing about The Bachelor(ette), she can be found chowing down in Los Angeles at BudgetFoodie.com.

Arie & Emily Get Hot and Heavy

Check out a few of our favorite moments from last night’s episode!

Arie + Emily = Zoom Zoom and a Boom Boom from ATR on Vimeo.

The Bachelorette Episode 8: Lemonade Toast to the Final 3

It’s time for another “most awkward moments” post featuring the final 4 guys: Chris, Sean, Jef, and of course, Arie. Let’s get to it…

5. Chris hires a Polka band.

This date was going so well, and then the Polka band for hire shows up. Nothing says “you’re the one” like throwing a mini-Oktoberfest for your lady.

4. Sean is lame, no doubt about it.

Ok, woah, I don’t know why/when Sean started using Brad’s signature “no doubt about it” line, but that’s definitely a deal-breaker. Also, the messy room with stuffed animals… not funny… like, at all.

P.S. –  Sean’s dad for the next Bachelor. Love him.

3. Arie’s parents no speaky English.

Arie’s date basically went like this…

Arie Sr: Ze ziet er anders uit in het echte leven.

Arie’s Mom: Ja, heeft ze nog wat werk gedaan?

Arie Sr: Ik kan het mis hebben, maar ik denk dat ze kreeg lip injecties.

Arie’s Mom: Ja, en een borstvergroting zeker.

Arie Sr: We’re talking about you…

(Try translating that convo via Google.) AWKWARD.

2. Jef keeps surprising Emily.

My favorite quote of the evening was “Jef didn’t tell me anything about a ranch…” Translate = “Jef didn’t tell me how loaded he is.” I mean, seriously, is it just me, or did her eyes light up with dollar signs when she saw how large and spacious his property is?

Do you see that? It’s called HOLMstead Ranch. Get it? Jef’s last name is HOLM. He is so loaded.

Also, Jef suggests that Emily is dressed perfectly for what they’re doing today.

1. Lemonade toast to the happy couple.

Let’s get to what everyone’s been secretly thinking… is Jef Mormon? The answer is, DUH. I mean, if you go back and listen to the part where Jef’s talking about why his parents aren’t there, the producers CLEARLY dubbed over the conversation with him saying they were away doing “charity work.” And the non-alcoholic party was a dead giveaway. I just don’t get why they’re making such a big deal about concealing it… My hypothesis is that the After the Final Rose episode will include a huge announcement that Jef is Mormon, and Emily will freak out. Calling it now.

Bonus:

I want to say one last thing about poor Chris who was sent home last week. I know that we hated on Chris early on, and many of you think he’s a psychotic, controlling a-hole with poor taste in ties, but let me say something… Think about it: if you were on a TV show to find love and you actually fell in love with someone and told them you loved them and introduced them to your family, and then they sent you home right after, and then they told you the reason they were sending you home is because your relationship didn’t move fast enough, wouldn’t you be pissed, too?

As our loyal reader, Hannah, put it…

“Oh, Chris. Why did you wear that tie? It was your downfall.”

Team Chris on BP3!

The Bachelorette Episode 6: Bravery Cup FTW

If there was any doubt in your mind that this season would be the sleepiest season ever, I submit to you Episode 6. Oh. My. God. Can there be like an earthquake in Croatia, or like Doug and Chris get into a fist fight, or Jef’s hair catches on fire, or something? Anything?

Anyway, this episode starts out with a MAJOR SHOCKING TWIST – Emily delivers the date card instead of the producers. Ryan sees this as a perfect opportunity to put his arm around Emily on the couch. Playa please.

Travis gets the first date card, and they wander around Croatia shopping and line dancing, and also trying to stand on a little rock on a wall to find true love.

I’m calling bulls*** on this one. Remember how we all found out via RealitySteve.com that the love clock wasn’t real? Do we not have any budget this season for some helicopter rides or hot tubs?

Producer: “Ok team, change of plans. We need to scour the streets of Croatia this week and see if we can find any free activities for this weeks’ dates. We spent our whole production budget on the last minute trophy dress.”

Also, did anyone else get some gay vibes from Travis?

Travis and Emily share a “romantic” dinner together and he opens up about his former engagement. Of course Emily comes out swinging with the “what do you think you did wrong” questions. CHILL OUT girl.

Travis wants to know if he can have a bite of his salad… Emily tells him to dig in, but she will not be eating this evening in preparation for the upcoming fantasy suite dates.

I actually felt pretty bad for Travis when he got sent home until he pulled the ol’ throwing the umbrella into the rain move…

This would have been way more dramatic if it wouldn’t have been raining and he could have thrown the umbrella into a bonfire… but then I guess he wouldn’t have had an umbrella. Touché, producers.

Next up the guys go on a group date to watch the latest Pixar release. Nothing like trying trying to get some back-row-of-the-theater action when you’re watching a freaking kids movie.

Doug has to make a point to mention that this would be a great movie to bring the little guy to. Barf.

Side note: I’d like to mention that Chris is growing on me a bit, and I actually thought he was looking a little hot last night.

After the movie screening, it’s time for the guys to be brave and put on some kilts. This is when it gets awkward…

How many of you girls were at home whistling and yelling, “Take it off! Let’s see those boxer briefs!” That’s right. NO ONE. This is what happens when you leave a man in charge of editing a racy scene in a women’s show.

I can’t remember the name of the stupid competition, so I’m just going to call it the Stupid Games for the remainder of this post.

First of all, I take back everything I just said about Chris…

Get it, girl. What about Arie throwing the log?

I don’t exactly find this “hot” either. I was lol’ing though when someone yelled “A for Effort!” after Chris tried to throw the log. Poor Chris…

And Chris, what were you thinking challenging Doug to a tug of war stupid game?

I was hoping there would be some all out brawl at the end, but Chris just awkwardly stood up and said “he got me.” Will someone just give Chris the damn bravery cup already?

“True bravery is when you aren’t afraid to try, fail, and look like a complete idiot.” – said no one, ever.

After the Stupid Games, Arie gets some alone time and throws Emily up against a wall to passionately press his fish lips against her face…

On Jef’s 1-on-1 time, he tells her a little secret…

“I’m freaking crazy about you.”

BLAHH! Ugh! Gross! Vomit! AHHHHH… this season is SO LAME. Arie is waaaay to horny, Jef is turning cheesy with his “you give me the type of feeling that people write novels about” lines, Sean is like a big dumb D1 football player who doesn’t say anything… do you see why I’m starting to like Chris now?

Emily and I are on the same page… Chris gets the bravery award AND the rose.

Back at the resort, Ryan is getting pumped up for his date by plucking his knuckle hairs and shaving his beard (he is a perfectionist, after all).

He’s looking forward to opening Emily’s oyster later and seeing her pearl. Arie is impressed.

Ryan is driving like 5 mph because he’s not really used to driving such small cars. He usually drives much larger off-roading type vehicles to make up for his insecurities.

He and Emily get to go fishing on an oyster boat (as a major foodie, this is like my dream). Emily spits out the freshest oyster ever because she’s classy like that.

Next they walk around town talking to random locals, and all Ryan can think about is that ”this may be the woman god has chosen for me.”

I’m pretty sure if it were up to God, you would have fallen off the oyster boat and would still be lost at sea.

At their dinner date, Emily arrives in a trophy-like dress which looks a bit more like cheap Christmas wrapping paper (hey, the producers had to round up something on short notice).

Ryan pulls out a list of qualities that his trophy wife (like seriously, enough with the trophy wife) would possess…

I couldn’t write down the long list of qualities quickly enough, so I might have missed a few, but here’s what I heard…

  1. loyal, stands by my side good or bad
  2. logical, not overly emotional
  3. ? I don’t think he said a #3.
  4. encourager, always lifting up
  5. faithful
  6. nurturer
  7. confident
  8. magnetic, someone people are drawn to
  9. loves to laugh
  10. servant (like bringing beers to him on the couch?)
  11. beautiful, sexy personality
  12. ? i think i got off track somewhere

WHAT WAS HE THINKING?

Emily lets him down easy and reminds him that while he is not the guy for her, he is “so funny, and great looking… and God knows you’re a great kisser.”

His response was the best…

“That is very shocking.”

I could watch that clip over, and over, and over…He goes home in his turquoise shoes.

Ryan is mostly concerned that the guys back at the house will also be very shocked that he is going home.

And he is also very concerned that the producers will give him a bad edit and make him look like an “arrogant ass.”

Naw…

Arie knows that this has been a very tough night for Emily having to send Ryan home and all, so he sneaks over to her oddly shabby apartment and makes out with her in bed.

She has the nerve to give him the rose that was supposed to go to Ryan. Ryan is likely at home right now saying “that is also very shocking.”

At the cocktail party, John Wolf (who?) is concerned that he’s on the chopping block, so he throws a Hail Mary pass and pulls out some funeral cards he bought at the local Croatian flea market, crumbles them up, and shoves them in his wallet. It works.

Doug is also concerned he might be going home, so he decides to make a move and put his arm around Emily.

Oh..yeah, there you go- wait, here.. here? Ok, yes.. yep, got it… ok.

Now that Doug has shown his Rico Suave side, and Wolfy has shown his heart, Emily has an impossible decision to make and she asks Chris for a 2nd rose.

Impeccable timing, Chris. As he always says, there are no rules on The Bachelor, and this is all real. Right.

More next week! Happy watching!

Pick a Team!

Which one of these guys is your fav? Pick a badge and show your support on Facebook by setting it as your profile pic. :)

 

 

 

 

The Bachelorette Episode 4: Doug Angry. Ryan Douchebag. Chris Hero.

In this week’s episode, we started off with a reminder of how great of a mommy Emily is.

Don’t get me wrong.. we love Little Ricki, but I think I’d rather see Emily rolling around in the sand with Arie or something. What happened to the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition type episodes? This season needs some scandal, pronto.

Anyway, Emily reminds us that this whole journey is only a means to an end, and what she’s really looking forward to is coming back to Bermuda with a baby in a stroller and preggers with round 2.

I hope at the very least the 2 babies are from different fathers…Seriously, I’m dying for something juicy.

The guys ride up to their new mansion on a bunch of mopeds like a scene from Dumb and Dumber.

So Doug gets the first 1-on-1 date, and of course he’s keeping his cool about it because, don’t forget, he is a mature 33 year old after all.

This guy is getting on my nerves. Count on the producers to give Arie a great edit here…

“Doug angry. Doug smash. Doug sad.”

Anyway, Emily doesn’t care that Doug is annoying as s*** because he is “so nice, and so good looking.” Has she learned a single thing from this journey? She feels like she could see them doing this on a daily basis – you know, because married couples travel to Bermuda with 13 other dudes all the time.

Just when we think Doug couldn’t be any more perfect, he pulls out the charity card. I did a little digging, and it turns out that Doug actually does have a charity (or at least a real looking charity website). Guys like this don’t impress me. Frankly, I think Harvey Levin of TMZ is hotter than this guy – at least he’s doing some real social good.

Emily isn’t falling for this Mr. Perfect act either.

She calls him out on it, and lets him know everyone has flaws. Heck, she even wears her PJs around the house sometimes. There are even days when she doesn’t eat workout, too.

This might be my favorite quote from the episode…. Doug says, “I’m not a genius, but I’m not dumb. I’m not wealthy, but I’m not poor. I’m just a guy.”

Doug not genius. Doug not wealthy. Doug just guy.

Enough with this lame date, let’s go to some hot dudes in NAUTICAL OUTFITS!!

Producers: Guys, today you’ll need your nautical casual outfits… yeah, nautical casual. We leave in 10.

Kalon is “certainly excited to hit the high seas with Emily…”  This is his element after all…. luxury yachting.

None of these guys (except Kalon, the avid fill-in-the-blank-luxurious-activity-person) have ever been on a yacht, but Sean’s feeling confident.

“I played D1 college football. I know what it’s like to be serious.”

I don’t know what D1 college football and yachting have in common, except both being douchey.

Anyway, there’s some lame race, and Jef rips his finger off, and then the red team goes home crying.

Ryan makes a toast to his future trophy wife…

Arie and Emily awkwardly fight over the blanket…

And Jef’s hair is doing… that.

Kalon still has that butt chin…

And then Ryan goes into what is, quite possibly, the best speech we have ever heard on this show.

“To whom much is given, much is required. I feel like you’ve been given an amazing opportunity. I know that you are different – I don’t feel like you’re just any Bachelorette. Coming into this, I was praying not only for myself, but I was praying for you that you would use this opportunity to really impact tons and tons of people. There’s going to be tons of young ladies that are going to watch you, and see how you respond to men, and how you treat them, and how you treat yourself, and how you hold yourself to a high standard…and we had to sit there and watch you and Arie kissing. And I had a little bit of a hard time with that.”

Record scratch. Woah, woah, woah…. WHAT is he even talking about? First of all, I love how Ryan is sprinkling in Bible verses to lead up to his grandiose point of how he’s upset that Emily and Arie were kissing. Second of all, I don’t think any of these young ladies are watching The Bachelorette to learn how a lady should treat men. Where are our 50 Shades of Grey sex scenes??!??!

Whatever, Jef gets the rose anyway.

Next up Nick and Wolfy get to go on a super awkward 2-on-1.

But back at the house, things are heating up between Doug and Chris.

Doug: “Blah, blah, blah.. I’m 33 and I’m so mature.”

Chris: “Can you put a damn v-neck under your sweatshirt for God’s sake?”

Ok, back to the 2-on-1… Things are going really great and everyone’s having a blast.

Nick gets sent home because he thinks he’s eating kwinowa. IT’S PRONOUNCED “KEEN-WAH” PEOPLE.

Ok, flash forward to the cocktail party. I love Jef just as much as the next gal, but I’m sorry – even if you have a rose, that does not give you an excuse to come to the rose ceremony dressed as Martin Short circa “Clifford.”

Ryan pulls out one last sweet talk session to secure his rose and tells Emily, “Just because you’re the center of attention doesnt automatically make you worthy.” This guy’s been reading “The Game” too much.

Then the producers tell him to he decides to chat with Michael in front of the fire where he tells him that he feels like he’s called to something higher… like The Bachelor Season 17.

And then finally – FINALLY – Chris steps it up and calls Doug out on his B.S. He “steals him away” and says…

Chris: I don’t believe you.
Doug: Believe what?
Chris:  I just don’t believe you in general.

YESSSSSSSSS. Chris just won my favorite effing Bachelor contestant ever award, and he sealed the deal with this line…

“I’m talking to you like a grown ass man.”

Chris, you may look a little creepy from some angles, and you could definitely pass as the Geico gekko, but either way, we salute you.

I sort of fell asleep during the rose ceremony but I do know that all of the idiots I hate got roses, and Michael went home crying.

Can’t wait for tonight’s episode to see more of America’s sweetheart and dearest mommy, Emily!

 

Bachelorette Episode 2 Recap: Nipples, Douchebags, and Love Clocks

Last night’s episode was filled with more men’s nipples than I have ever seen in my entire life.

I mean, am I the only girl in the world who isn’t turned on by dudes’ nipples? I don’t need a guy with a big chest. A not-that-hairy one with no manboobs is sufficient for me.

Ryan get’s the first date card, but Emily has some hesitations about him…

“I don’t know that much about Ryan yet. He seems like a very nice gentleman, but he makes me a little bit nervous just cuz he’s so good looking. I mean the last guy I really dated was Brad, and he was crazy good looking, and we all know how that turned out so…”

Actually, I’m still not really clear on how that turned out. I always thought that Brad seemed like a great fit for her and her lifestyle, obviously loved her very much, and was willing to take on the responsibility of being a father for Ricki – yet she dumped him and Brad now apparently thinks he dodged a bullet. She’s right – she should go for an ugly dude so he won’t bail when she starts acting super demanding.

Also, Brad: crazy good looking? I’d say a 7 at best.

Anyway, Ryan being the good sport that he is tells us, “to be very honest, I’m open to do whatever, anytime.”

Heh.

Five bags of heavy groceries and a floral apron later, he changes his tune.

“I’m willing to do most anything for Emily.”

But to make up for his manual labor, Emily lets Ryan sit in the car from a distance and watch her drop off the cookies at soccer practice.

Best. Date. Ever.

Seriously though, is she just trying to scare off every single guy? If I have to hear her say “this is what you’re signing up for” one more time, I’m going to lose it. These guys are not signing up to be Ricki’s daddy, they are signing up to have sex in the fantasy suite with the “hottest Bachelorette ever”, and then bounce post final rose ceremony.

Exhibit A:

Emily is unsure if the feelings are mutual between them. Ryan responds with some weird statement about how “it’s all out here — in my head too and around us.”

If that doesn’t scream “I don’t know what else to say because I’m not really into you, but I’m hoping we can make out anyway,” I don’t know what does.

Enough of this mom stuff, now on to the romantic dinner portion of the date.

They barely get a sip of wine down and Emily already busts out the “I have some questions” line. There were some animal analogies tossed around and I got really confused, but I think the jist of it was that Emily wants a guy who will just do whatever she says at a moment’s notice, because that’s what they’re signing up for.

The night ends with a cheesy pickup line about how Ryan has never been in the presence of someone so beautiful… And Emily does a follow-up interview in her Cheesecake Factory employee uniform.

Next up on the group date, Stevie shows up in a dumbass looking “performance outfit.”

This is when the show just gets too stupid for even me to watch.

Look, I love the Muppets just as much as the next guy, but this season is like family-friendly b.s. or something. Where are my steamy hot tub scenes?? Why aren’t there any drunken fist fights going on back at the mansion? This season is lame.

Charlie is all nervous because he fell off a roof and hit his funny bone.

I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess he wasn’t funny before the accident.

Believe it or not, the standup comedy acts fell flat again this season. These guys must have fallen off a skyscraper… (too soon?)

Stevie takes this challenge really seriously and thinks he’s actually auditioning for a role in The Muppets Musical…

And then Jef proposes to Miss Piggy in a super romantic and sincere fashion.

I love you Jef, even if you spell your name in a kind of douchebaggy way.

After the show, Creepy Chris flashes Emily some reallllllly weird glances…

But Emily is apparently into it and tells him that “one of the things I like about you is that… you’re sooo good looking.”

For someone who has learned from her past mistakes, she seems to really be into the hot guys.

Despite Emily’s best effort to create awkwardness, she and Jef have a totally normal conversation. More bonus points for our favorite entrepreneur!

Stevie talks smack on Kalon, and Kalon comes back with the quote of the night…

“I wouldn’t like me either if I were you, but fortunately, I’m me.”

I know everyone thinks this guy is a tool because he dresses all Ivy league and talks out of the side of his mouth, but I actually think he’s hilarious. Think about it – if Erica Rose would have said his line of the night, people would think it’s hilarious. I can think of at least one other guy who is a bigger douchebag than Kalon this season…

Starting with Doug. Ok, America loves him because he has a kid, but I think Kalon actually got a bad edit on the whole “you took a break from being a dad” comment. We don’t know the context of the situation, but after going back and listening to it a few more times, it actually sounds like he was trying to pay Doug a compliment. I could be wrong, but Doug wouldn’t even let him finish. And let’s not forget that the reason this conversation even came up was because Doug was lecturing everyone about how they need to really think about being ready to be a father. Ok dude, just because you had a kid when you were 20 and gave up your dreams and all of your other sob stories doesn’t mean that you’re any more prepared to be a father to Little Ricki. It just means that you’re arrogant and bitter that you gave up all your dreams. And for that, I give you the biggest douchebag award of the night.

Sorry, tangent. Anyway, Jef gets the rose and he looks super stoked about it. I’m starting to think he’s just not that into her.

Ok, final date goes to Joe, who Emily thinks looks like Matthew McConnahoweveryouspellit.

A really greasy lookalike.

Anyway, they go on a trip to West Virginia where Emily’s “heart is.” I feel like this is the first I’m hearing of this West Virginia girl nonsense. All I ever hear her talking about is how great Charlotte is – am I right?

They go to some hotel called The Greenbriar and swim in the pool and then get dressed up all fancy for dinner. Emily starts in with the hardcore questions again about where Joe sees himself in 5 years, and he responds he wants to be happy.

I thought that was a really distasteful loaded question for her to ask if she wasn’t going to take his answer at face value. It’s like when future employers ask you where you see yourself in five years – everyone knows you’re supposed to say “I see myself moving up into a management role here within this company” or whatever, but you feel like a douche saying it because really you’re just thinking “I just need a job man, I’ll worry about 5 years from now later.” HE WANTS TO BE HAPPY. If he says he sees himself with Emily having 18 children, that would have been creepy, so he keeps it vague. How is he supposed to know if there will be anything between them? He just met her 15 minutes ago. He realizes she isn’t pleased, so he steps it up a notch with the love clock and writes a note about visiting this place again with her family.

Which obviously backfired because he was sent home immediately and missed the fireworks show.

“He didn’t do anything wrong,” Emily says. But he just didn’t do anything right.

Back at the pre-rose ceremony cocktail party, Aaron is looking like a super hot hipster version of Hugh Grant.

He gets sent home because he’s not rich enough.

And Tony has to sit and listen to a SEVEN PAGE LETTER from the producers Ryan to Emily.

This Jon Wolf guy we’ve never heard of also hates Kalon and says “if you have Louis Vuitton luggage and you’re a dude, you’re an a**hole.”

I’ve decided that from this point forward, no matter what happens, I am Team Kalon because I think he will end up being hilarious and misunderstood a la Michelle Money.

One last thing: did anyone notice Emily was whispering the whole rose ceremony? “Alessandro, will you please accept this rose?”

GAG.

Bachelorette Fantasy League Standings: Episode 1

Well we’re only one episode into the new season of The Bachelorette, and big points have already been awarded!

This week, Emily gave Doug the first impression rose for 300 points, Michael gave Emily a guitar pick for 100 points, and Jackson took his shirt off after the final credits for a douchebag moment that made someone 200 points richer.

Congrats to Anna Johnson, Chrystal Zimmerman, and Sakura Cosidine who are tied for the lead with 500 points!

See the full standings here.

The Top 8 Moments of The Bachelor, “The Women Tell All” Episode

All I have to say is last night has been the most exciting episode of this sub-par season. And here are a few of the highlights…

10. Bitches be all up ons Ed.

Ed as the next Bachelor???

9. Wait, who’s hooking up?

Our favorite contestant of all time Hey Mickey (well mine anyway, besides Reid) is hooking up with Cristina (who?) from Andrew’s season.

Jon from Ashley’s season is hooking up with Stacey from Brad 2.0′s season (match made in heaven obviously).

And Kasey Kahl is hooking up with Lisa P., also from Brad 2.0′s season (because she looks nothing like Vienna).

I’m still processing all of this…

8. Reid is back, and he’s hotter and snarkier than ever.

I love you, Reid.

7. Ali & Frank: Can they reconcile?

This will never, ever, ever work.

6. Erica is still hilarious.

“It was probably hard for Ali to see Frank because she was dumped by him for a younger girl, and she wasn’t really looking her best…” – Erica

5. Blakeley calls girls “small-minded”…

…yet she has never, ever said anything bad about any of them.

Blakeley, get off your high horse (no pun intended).

4. Emily’s boobs tell all.


3. Brittney yo no quiero Taco Bell.

We haven’t heard two words out of her mouth all season, but I was totally impressed by her smackdown on Samantha, referring to her as the house chihuahua.

2. Erica is sorry about the thighs comment… kind of.

I was proud of Shawntel for stating that she didn’t care if the ladies called her a b****, but that she wouldn’t stand for the negative comments about her body image. Erica graciously apologized sort of, but then made some weird comment about how it’s okay because she also has big hips herself. Huh?

1. Courtney’s pathetic breakdown.

This is the fakest cry I’ve seen…

…well, since this:


Top 10 Moments of The Bachelor, Episode 6

I’m really sorry to keep writing the SAME blog post over and over, but really – every top 10 list I write is another list of reasons why I can’t stand Courtney, plus a few other random things for good measure. So here it goes…

10. Courtney’s tattoo art shows that she’s definitely not more mature than a 5th grader

Courtney has absolutely no boundaries, which is why I hate her. She has no respect for the other girls on the date, and no respect for Ben either. I mean, how is Ben supposed to make out with one of the other girls with this ridiculous tattoo on his back?

9. Emily is a saint, Courtney still a biyatch

When Emily apologized, I really fell in love with her. That apology was way over the top and not necessary, but God bless her for having a good heart and being willing to acknowledge her faults. Thankfully for the producers, there is still plenty of drama this season, as Courtney is not willing to forgive and forget. She “doesn’t take being disrespected lightly.” Good for you, Courtney.

8. Courtney is so wet on the boat, let’s everyone know

I’m not even going to dignify that moment with commentary.

7. Blakeley made a weird scrapbook/vision board

Does anyone else remember the last Vision Board Girl? It didn’t end well that time, either.

And we were definitely cheering when Blakeley got sent home after making a scene about going on a 2-0n-1 date in front of poor Rachel. TEAM RACHEL!!!

6. Courtney gets all local native on us

5. Courtney tells everyone that she’s “being stolen away”

Thanks for rubbing it in, Courtney. No one cares that he’s still mesmerized by your t**s.

4. Jamie is creepy

Rule #1: If you’re not a slut, don’t try to be a slut.

Also, I don’t think that dress was meant for straddling.

3. Casey S. has the most awkward cry ever

Someone please turn it off. I can’t watch.

2. Courtney might be going home – just kidding

Honestly, this girl is so over the top disrespectful, even I don’t think it’s funny (and I love train wrecks). I know Courtney’s not here to make friends, but what does she think Ben’s family is going to think when they see this episode? Think ahead, sweetheart. They’re gonna hate you if he’s dumb enough to pick you. And for those of you who think she’s getting the “Michelle Money” editing treatment, I completely disagree. Michelle was definitely spun to be more off-the-wall and aggressive than we saw later in interviews, but she would never say the awful things Courtney has said this season.

and the #1 moment is…

1. Courtney frolics in the pool – may as well be topless

Once again, I still hate you.

BONUS VICTORY MOMENT – BEN CAN’T SEEM TO FIND ROOM 1611:

 

Fantasy Bachelor League Update

Well we’re just about halfway through the season, and it’s time for an update on the Fantasy Bachelor League! You can always keep up with the scores here.

Congrats to the following people who are currently tied for 1st place with 800 points!

Tami B.
Tammy H.
Maury H.
Amanda H.
Kristi R.

If you’d like to get in on the action, be sure to join next season by week 1. We’ll post more details here before the next season starts.