Monthly Archives: March 2012

Bachelor Ben Season 16

The Top 8 Moments of The Bachelor, “The Women Tell All” Episode

March 8, 2012 – 7:29 pm

All I have to say is last night has been the most exciting episode of this sub-par season. And here are a few of the highlights…

10. Bitches be all up ons Ed.

Ed as the next Bachelor???

9. Wait, who’s hooking up?

Our favorite contestant of all time Hey Mickey (well mine anyway, besides Reid) is hooking up with Cristina (who?) from Andrew’s season.

Jon from Ashley’s season is hooking up with Stacey from Brad 2.0′s season (match made in heaven obviously).

And Kasey Kahl is hooking up with Lisa P., also from Brad 2.0′s season (because she looks nothing like Vienna).

I’m still processing all of this…

8. Reid is back, and he’s hotter and snarkier than ever.

I love you, Reid.

7. Ali & Frank: Can they reconcile?

This will never, ever, ever work.

6. Erica is still hilarious.

“It was probably hard for Ali to see Frank because she was dumped by him for a younger girl, and she wasn’t really looking her best…” – Erica

5. Blakeley calls girls “small-minded”…

…yet she has never, ever said anything bad about any of them.

Blakeley, get off your high horse (no pun intended).

4. Emily’s boobs tell all.


3. Brittney yo no quiero Taco Bell.

We haven’t heard two words out of her mouth all season, but I was totally impressed by her smackdown on Samantha, referring to her as the house chihuahua.

2. Erica is sorry about the thighs comment… kind of.

I was proud of Shawntel for stating that she didn’t care if the ladies called her a b****, but that she wouldn’t stand for the negative comments about her body image. Erica graciously apologized sort of, but then made some weird comment about how it’s okay because she also has big hips herself. Huh?

1. Courtney’s pathetic breakdown.

This is the fakest cry I’ve seen…

…well, since this:


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Bachelor Ben Season 16 Top 10 Moments

Top 10 Moments of The Bachelor: The Fantasy Dates

March 5, 2012 – 5:54 pm
10. Ben & Nikki go on the Most Predictable Date in Bachelor History
Helicopter, Picnic, Dinner, Hot Tub.
Was anyone else bored out of their mind on this date? It was basically just 20 minutes of Nikki talking.
I did enjoy Ben hooting like an owl off the cliff at the end, and Nikki screaming woooooo like a drunk college girl in response.
9. Ben wants to have 4 kids and Nikki will have them like, tomorrow
I cringed as she awkwardly washed him with bubbles in the hot tub and became some sort of aggressive sex monster in about 5 seconds – giving us a clear indication of what happened the rest of the night.
8. Ben is terrified of rappelling
So yeah, Ben totally FREAKED OUT when he found out what they were doing on this date ….when really, the activity basically consisted of some slow swinging from ropes and kissing all the way down. Lindzi may have said ‘oh my god’ somewhere around 17 times, but at least she appeared to be brave about it.
I kind of felt sorry for Lindzi too — compared to Nikki and Courtney’s Swiss picnics – her date was way more extreme and not nearly as romantic.
But at least they found a romantic hot tub (surprise!) in someone’s backyard afterwards.
7. Lindzi doesn’t typically go home with guys but………
Sidenote: Is she wearing underwear?
6. Ben & Courtney continue to be annoying together
These two deserve each other. Hey Cow sounds like a miserable. pointless game —  and the cows were clearly NOT amused.
5. Later that night, Ben buys Courtney’s fake apology and completely forgives her
4. Kacie flys to Switzerland to try and get Ben back warn him about Courtney
She’s back and she means business in that leather coat. Did ABC fly her all the way to Switzerland just for this?? It was so obvious she just wanted to see him again, and he wasn’t really listening to anything she was saying. How embarrasing for her. I hope these 2 have a nice long chat at Women Tell All…..
3. The Classic Hallway Meltdown
This was ALMOST as good as the time Ali Fedotowsky did the same thing after attempting to get Jake back.
2. Ben’s bowtie
Hideous. He looks like a physics professor.
1. Emily goes on her “first date” with………….Ashley Hebert and Ali Fedotowsky
I can’t believe Emily is taking advice from these two: Ashley, ABC’s 3rd choice and arguably the worst Bachelorette of all time, and Ali, the recently dumped also ex-Bachelorette who is currently failing at her new mission in life, living solely on her reality tv fame (which is just mostly just InTouch covers at this point).
Emily, stay away from these two, you are in such a better league than them! I think we all agree that Emily’s season is going to restore the Bachelorette franchise back to it’s golden days — pre-hometown girlfriends, pre-Bentleys, pre-immature hallway meltdowns. Back to where Jillian Harris left us off.
Does anyone else NOT go out with their girlfriends to empty movie theaters with 3D glasses on? I was so embarrassed for Emily when this happened. I wonder how much Titanic 3D paid for this blatant product placement.
Also, another highlight of the date: Did anyone else know that Ashley wasn’t really physically attracted to her now-fiance, JP, the night she met him? Thanks for letting him (and America) know about that, Ashley! I’m sure that burned a little.
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